Tuesday, April 06, 2010

How to have the perfect flat tire

Step 1: Ignore the slightly funny, very easy-to-ignore noise as you drive home from work.

Step 2: Forget to mention said noise to your automotively gifted husband that evening.

Step 3: Head to your physical therapy appointment – which happens to be at a gym – the next morning.

Step 4: As you drive to the gym, ignore said noise again.  Also ignore the nagging, something-just-doesn’t-seem-right feeling.

Step 5: Endure the intense pressure on your aching gastrocnemius muscle.  Enjoy the ankle massage and heat therapy.  Revel in the guilty pleasure of the gossip rag.

Step 6: Say g’bye to your PT friends and appreciate a few of the brawny, built, buff ProClub employees on your way out.  Privately deny that you, a 53-year-old woman, even noticed them.

Step 7: Start your car, back out of the parking spot, and notice that something now most definitely doesn’t feel right.

Step 8: Get out of your car and notice this:


Step 9: Decide that you-are-woman, hear-you-roar, you can change a silly flat tire.  You’ve been working out lately and you have new muscles of your own, thankyouverymuch,

Step 10:


Step 11:


Step 12:


Step 13: Be glad that this is right around the corner.  Also be glad that there’s no internet access there, which means you can’t very well work, but you can prepare a blog post.


Step 14: Get to work late and appreciate your good fortune amid your bad fortune.

Step 15: Thank JJay and Josh PROFUSELY for both fixing your flat tire and brightening your day before noon. ;-)

Thank you, JJay and Josh! 

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Tonya said...

Hmmmmmm. Definitely worth it! (From another 53-year-old who NEVER notices such things...)

Lynn said...

I'd say that is definitely the way to have the perfect flat tire!

Lorrene said...

Oh come on now, you can't fool me. You flattened that tire on purpose. Heeheheheheee teehee

Goofball said...

hahaha I love grandma's remark. I become suspicious too :)

Maria said...

Well, I'm not in my 50s and I most definitely noticed straight away. :)

jen said...

UH, I have a flat tire and I need help. Please send the guy in blue.

Holy Moly, Carol. Talk about turning lemons into a nice tall glass of lemonade.

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