Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Please don't tell me I've done this to my kids!

So I was at the kitchen sink, scrubbing a frying pan, when I looked out the window and caught the figure of a gray cat, looking up into a tree.  Since both Boo and Bailey are gray and the cat was near the back of the yard and facing away from me, I wasn't immediately sure which cat this was -- Boo...

Boo

...or Bailey:

IMG_0122

As I looked at the gray cat staring up into the tree, I assumed it was Boo, and immediately thought to myself, 'That sly hunter!  He's stalking his pray in the tree, calculating his next move...  What a smart cat!'

As the cat turned toward me for a moment, I realized that it was actually Bailey and caught myself thinking, 'What a space cadet, staring up into nothingness like that!  My god, what does go on in that airy little Bailey-brain?!'

I was immediately ashamed, of course, and I couldn't help but wonder whether I'd done this to my KIDS at any point.  If I had, surely that would have scarred them for life and I'd be guilty of horrible parenting filled with all the taboos -- stereotyping, favoritism, assumptions, and all those other travesties that lead to negative self-esteem, insecurity and... oh my god, a life of crime?!

Have a screwed these guys up for life?  I simply can't bear the responsibility!  Must I now reflect upon all those times that I might have treated them unfairly and not even realized it, skewing expectations and stereotyping my own childrenIMG_4326

Oh my god, what have I DONE?!

Sigh.

On second thought, they seem pretty balanced to me -- and they certainly have each carved their own path with confidence and aplomb.  They sure don't hesitate to be exactly who they are, no matter what any of the others -- or Tom and me, for that matter -- think of it. 

I guess they'll be OK.

But it looks like it will take some major snuggle sessions to repair the damage I probably did to poor Bailey. 

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2 comments:

Lilly said...

You're a great mom and I'm sure you didn't Boo & Bailey your kids. Hmmm but looking at the photo of the four of them, the girls are looking more outgoing and smiley than the boys.... (Only kidding.)

jennifer said...

I can't help but think what Lilly said - those girls are going to take over the world. Of course, the boys can also take over the world in subtle, quiet ways! (And how did you get a photo with Peter smiling? Incredible.)

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